Monday, September 22, 2014

Scaredy Cat

I flew in a small plane yesterday, a very very small plane, so small that it had its own parachute.  Having been invited to be the only passenger in this plane, I hesitated at first and then jumped at the chance, thinking a lot about my decision before I made it.

The reality is that I never would have done this ten years ago, or even six years ago.  I would have been too scared and would have been ruled by my fear, thinking, "I don't do that kind of thing".  Flying in a 2-seater was never on my bucket list. In fact, I don't have a bucket list.  I just don't think that way.

I do, however, think a lot about choice and saying yes to life rather than being riddled with fear and doubt.  When my husband first proposed scuba diving 3 years ago, I remember feeling the immediate fear factor attempting to take over and then realized I could be in control.  I realized that fear had kept me from so many opportunities throughout life and that perhaps there was an alternative.  The same thing happened with this flight.

What a glorious thing this flight was, flying over Iowa farmland at a height of around 3,000 feet.  It was so much more intimate than my usual and frequent commercial flights of 35,000 feet, with flocks of birds below me and magnificent scenery all around forming patterns of green and brown and blue.

 I am neither dumb nor reckless.  My pilot was a friend who is one of the most careful and intentional people I know and trust.  He cared for me, cared for us, piloted us with experience and precision, and respected my fears.

I loved it and didn't love it.  The bumpy air was not so kind to my stomach but the experience was fantastic.  Knowing that I could do it was a priceless experience, and ridding the title of scaredy cat from my personal resume felt just right.